Full Metal Freeloader: A squirrel in shining armor
The body armor might protect him from BBs and pellets, but since he’d have no chance of shimmying up to pilfer my bird feeder, I’d have no reason to shoot at him in the first place.
I don’t dislike squirrels per se; the only reason I shoot them is to save birdseed for the more aesthically pleasing wildlife that frequents my lawn. As much as we’ve built up our anti-squirrel defenses, they have a tough time getting a free meal buck-naked.
No way he could drag that sheet metal anchor up the poll.